Parenting is not easy.

Every day decisions can be challenging and may leave you questioning if you made the right choice for your child.

But medical decisions can prove to be even trickier.

Sometimes we need a little extra help and support in making choices that will affect our children’s health.

In addition to this, people are mean and quick to judge.

We often have to deal with other people’s opinions and criticism on the choices that we make.

We can also be persuaded to make choices that we would rather not.

Laws, courts and people like Child Protective Services can also force your child to receive treatment that you may not want them to have, especially when your child’s life is at risk.

The problem with all of this is that it only makes the situation for the parent even more difficult.

Here are some tips on how to make hard medical decisions for your child, easier on you.

1. Research

This is, by far, the number one way to make the best decision possible.

If you haven’t noticed yet, I almost always recommend research when it comes to facing a dilemma.

Why?

Because research is what gives us the power to make better decisions in life.

Reading about the topic that you are faced with will give you the knowledge that you need to make the best choice possible.

It is important to read from valid sources, such as research articles and valid medical sites.

Many people will bash going to social media for “research,” but it can actually be helpful if – and only if – you take it in the right way.

There are people who only rely on social media and things that other people around them say as their source of information.

Don’t do that.

Do that only in conjunction with valid resources.

For instance, I have a rare health condition.

There is not much written research-wise about it because it is so rare.

However, since Covid, it is becoming more prominent.

It helps me to read what people are saying on social media about it and to understand what they are going through with their own experiences with it.

Social media can be helpful this way.

But I am only going to get the best understanding of my condition when I pair that with research articles and studies that have already taken in.

2. Talk to People

When faced with making a challenging medical decision for your child, talk with everyone you can!

Speak with as many medical professionals about your child’s condition as you can.

You may hear that most of them are in agreement, but there may be one professional that says something that may be pivotal.

For instance, I spent years working with medical professionals over trying to figure out my son’s chronic constipation.

In one discussion with a nurse, she suggested that perhaps he could have a spinal issue, such as a tethered cord injury.

It was then that I realized that we needed to get an MRI done.

Sure enough, the MRI showed that he has a very rare spinal cord issue that is not only causing his constipation issues, but bladder ones, too.

Had I not spoken with that nurse, I would have lost valuable time on getting help for my son.

Talk to anyone and everyone!

Speak to medical professionals, mostly, because they have the most expertise when it comes to medical conditions.

But you never know when a friend of a friend may have faced a similar issue with her child.

Or the pastor at your church may know of someone who also encountered a similar medical issue.

Chat with the people on social media sites who have the same condition as your child to see what they’re experiences have been.

Find out what treatments have helped them or maybe haven’t helped much at all.

3. Write it Down

You are going to have alot of information comin’ at ya!

Just with doing research, speaking with doctors and other people in your circle.

Write everything down!

Make a list of pros and cons to show how things may look if you do one medical procedure versus another.

Draw lines, make charts, design boxes, etc to show how your medical choices will lead to the best outcome for your child.

Write down what you want your child’s future to look like and how these medical decisions may affect them that way.

Nobody wants to use paper and pencil anymore.

They want to plug everything into their phone.

But when you write it all out the old-fashioned way, you may see it more clearly and have more room to write and make connections between words.

So grab a notebook!

Get a pen!

And start writing it all out!

4. Clear the Criticism

One thing that really bothers me and will hamper my self-esteem in an instant is other peoples’ criticizm.

For some reason, it makes me question everything that I have ever known.

I know that I shouldn’t let people’s words get to me, but they do.

And I have to work extra hard to break through that.

When you are faced with an important medical decision for your child, it will be the prime time for some people to come out and just be complete assholes!

I never knew that some of my friends felt that going through a fertility clinic to have a child meant automatic health issues.

“Well, you don’t know anything about the donor. That health condition is probably all on his side of the family.”

“Have you done genetic testing? Because I am sure that the donor you used was a defective one.”

And, I have to roll my eyes at this comment:

“That’s why you get married and have kids the right way so that these things don’t happen.”

Hm.

Harsh.

So getting married is guaranteed protection against disease and rare illness?

Huh.

(Eye roll)

Clear the criticizm!

Everyone is going to have something to say.

Take the relevant advice and feedback from the comments that make sense and discard the shitty ones.

Remember, you are making a life-changing decision for your child and you don’t need the fog to cover your vision.

Let go the crap that people tell you and hold on to the words that are actually going to make a difference.

5. Know the Law

Believe it or not, the law can step in and make decisions for the health of your child.

It doesn’t matter if you have religious beliefs or personal beliefs about certain treatments.

If your child’s life is in danger, the law can step in and force your child into certain treatment.

And then turn around and charge you with neglect or abuse for not doing what they feel would be best for your child.

It may be helpful to talk to a lawyer or a patient advocate to help you make legally sound decisions so that you don’t end up in trouble.

Our world is so different today.

There are so many hands in the pot.

Society wants you to bare the brunt of providing for your child financially and physically.

But they sure as hell can step in and take over whenever their beliefs don’t match yours.

Tread lightly here and make certain that you take this into consideration when making medical choices for your child.

If you choose one direction versus the other, will Child Protective Services show up at your doorstep?

Make sure you ask yourself this question.

It won’t be long before the entire country is forced to be vaccinated.

Whether you like it or not.

6. Trust Your Gut

You can do all of the research in the world, but nothing matches up to your gut.

If you know in your heart that one way is better than the other, then that is probably the way to go.

As a parent, we have an internal instinct that we also need to try to recognize.

Today, parental instinct is brushed aside.

We rely too much on science, politics, laws and religion to determine our choices in life.

A parent is given a wonderful gift the day that their child is born (and even in utero).

The gift of instinct.

And it should never be completely dismissed.

Always make certain that you take into consideration what your heart is saying when it comes to your child.

5. Take it In and Spit it Out

The decision that you make may be a very serious, life-altering choice for your child.

And you’re not going to take it lightly!

You have gathered as much research as your brain could handle.

You’ve spoken to as many people as possible.

And you’ve written it all down.

You even studied the law.

Finally, you’ve listened to your internal parental instinct.

Now take a good look at your child and your hopes and dreams for him.

Is this decision going to make your child’s life better?

How will it change the course?

Weigh the options, the benefits and the consequences.

You will make the best decision.