It is so easy to take a look at what others have and say, “God, I wish I had that, too!”
And then we start to focus on how we can get that.
We start to feel a little resentment against the person who has what we actually want.
We may become embarrassed by what we actually have instead of what we don’t have.
Does this sound all too familiar?
We may not realize that we are experiencing these feelings.
But when we do recognize them, it is important to take note of that.
So, what is the best way to handle all of this?
Taking a look at what we do have.
And learning to love what we got!
Once we learn this, we start to open doors for other good things to come our way!
And who knows?
Maybe one day we will have that one thing that someone else has, too!
1. Why Do You Want That?
First of all, take a look at what it is that you really want.
Maybe your friend just bought a beautiful new house and you’re still stuck at your parents’ house.
You sure would like a nice house like that!
Why?
What is it about that house that makes you want one?
Is it the freedom?
The luxury?
The successful appearance within society?
What is it about that house that makes you really want one, too?
Seriously.
Think about it.
Let’s say you’ve identified the reason as just truly wanting to be viewed as successful.
Ok.
Maybe, right now, you can’t have a nice house like that.
What other things do you have that fulfill that feeling?
Perhaps your friend has that house, but you have more money than she does because now she just spent all of hers on that house.
Cool!
Alright.
You probably do have more money than her sitting in your bank account.
In that respect, you are more successful!
Focus on that for now.
Another Example:
Perhaps the family next door is taking a luxury vacation.
You wish that you could take your family on such a vacation!
Why?
Dig deep.
Really, really deep.
Think about this.
Are you really just needing a break from everyday life?
If that’s the case, maybe you can take a long weekend and just take it easy.
Are you wanting to actually get away?
Maybe you can plan a long weekend at a local destination.
Perhaps that luxury vacation that that family is taking simply reminds you that you really just want to spend more time with your own kids.
If so, plan a family day or weekend and focus on every minute with your little ones!
Taking the focus off of what someone else has and really taking a deeper look at why we would truly want that for ourselves helps us to look at other ways that we can fulfill that need.
What is something someone else has right now that you really, really want?
Why do you really want that?
2. Quit Being Grateful for What You Got!
Yup!
I said it!
Stop being grateful.
I think that we throw that phrase out there so much that no one even knows what to do with it anymore!
“Just be grateful for what you have!”
“Be thankful for what you got!”
No.
Just stop listening to people saying that!
Here’s what you should do instead.
Take a look at where you would be if you didn’t have what you have right now.
Example:
Right now, I am sitting here working on my laptop.
My laptop is nothing fancy.
It’s an older model.
The thing runs slow and sometimes I have to fully shut it down in order to give it a break so that it will run better.
Does it cause me to cuss up a storm sometimes because I get so damn frustrated with it?
Absolutely!
But guess what?
It gets the job done.
It may take longer than I’d like, but it does what I need it to do.
Where would I be if I didn’t have it?
Well, I wouldn’t be sitting here talking to you, that’s for sure!
I would probably be out working an overnight shift somewhere doing some mundane miserable work that I would despise.
I would probably be having a hard time keeping up with the job physically because of my debilitating health condition.
And, most certainly, I wouldn’t be able to sit here and watch my precious babies sleep while I work on my laptop!
So, when thinking about my old laptop here, I really do love it!
Why?
Because it is keeping me from having a miserable life outside of here and it is allowing me to be with my children – which is all I really want in life!
Now.
You try.
What is something that you wish that you had?
What do you have instead?
Where would you be in life right now without what you have?
3. Use What You Got to Get What You Want!
There is almost always a way to get what we want just by using what we have.
It may take a long time.
It may take some extra hard work.
Heck!
It may eat up most of our energy!
But, if after following the above two steps, you still really, really want what someone else has, you can find a way to get it, too!
Use what you have to get there!
I have this old, run down laptop.
Hmph.
But I am using it to get what I want.
And I want nothing more than for my work in life to consist of making the world a better place!
For everyone!
My old laptop, here, helps me to spread the word on ways to do just that!
My laptop gives me hope that my words will help others to feel empowered to make a difference, too!
For other parents to want to raise their children in ways that will change our world for the better!
But my desire is not going to happen overnight.
I don’t have billions of dollars (like some other people do) that I could spend on making other differences in the world that could improve its livelihood.
I don’t have that.
Wish I did!
But I don’t.
And that’s ok.
But I do have this.
And I know that it is going to take time.
Energy.
Hard work.
My old laptop.
Yes.
But I am using what I do have (my laptop, my knowledge, my eagerness to learn more) in order to get there!
And guess what, my friends?
You can do it, too!
Your Turn
You don’t have to have what Suzie has or Mike has.
Use what you’ve got!
Then find a way to get there with it!
Let’s go back to that something that you want.
Think about it.
Now let’s review what you have that could help you to get there.
Are you a great speaker?
Do you have a lot of love in your heart to give?
Do you have some knowledge that could support you on getting there?
Got some extra cash stashed somewhere that you could invest in, in order to make bigger money down the road?
How about motivation?
Got a weight loss plan sitting on a shelf?
How about increasing the 10 minutes of jogging that you already do in order to work up towards jogging like the professional you’ve always wanted to be?
Take a good hard look at what you’ve got!
Right now!
It’s gonna get you somewhere if you use it and use it right!
Givin’ it all a Snuggle!
So you’re eyeing something that someone else has.
And you want it, too!
Don’t get mean or resentful!
Don’t feel embarrassed by what you have instead.
Take a good look at why you really want what they’ve got!
Once you figure that out, brush all of those feelings aside and focus on what you have!
Figure out how you can use the things that you have in order to get to where you want to go!
Whether it be a drive, a passion, motivation, or an item in your possession.
Use these things to help get you to where you want to be!
Hey!
Love what you got!
Because it just may take you to where you want to go!
Mama Morgan is a single parent by day and a writer by night! She is raising two, young children with special needs during a global pandemic. She aims to give other parents confidence, hope, and a practical, down-to-earth reading adventure through her own experiences. While Morgan is heavily focused on caring for her little ones, she is also dedicated to helping others and making the world a better place. Mama’s Grilled Cheese is just her delicacy!